July 2011
1 post
4 tags
June 2011
8 posts
10 tags
4 tags
3 tags
6 tags
Puss? IN BOOTS
At first I was going to be a cynical ass about this Puss in Boots trailer, but, well. Then I actually watched it, and it looks better than the Shrek movies. And given that the Shrek movies are pretty much the only thing CGI related of any quality that Dreamworks puts out, I’m pretty interested in this.
I mean, it looks like Cliched Action Fantasy Movie 101, starring Ridiculous Renditions of...
4 tags
4 tags
Scary Movie 5 is a thing
REALLY AMERICA!? WHY!? STOP THIS STOP MAKING THESE MOVIES STOP SEEING THESE MOVIES STOP ENCOURAGING THE SLOW DEATH OF OUR COLLECTIVE CULTURAL TASTES I SWEAR YOU PEOPLE MAKE ME WANT TO MOVE TO CANADA
4 tags
we? who? wii u!
It seems life is intent on always proving me wrong. I thought the Wii was an awful name for a gaming console, but that didn’t really seem to matter.
But now I work retail, and I can explain to you exactly why the Wii U is an AWFUL name.
Reason One Nintendo has focused more on the controller than the console. I had to wade through several announcement stories to even FIND a picture of the...
6 tags
x-men: first class
It’s a good thing that I don’t really like the X-Men.
Clarification: I like the X-Men. I just don’t really like them.
I watched the 90s cartoon some back in the day (don’t watch it now unless you own a pair of rose-tinted glasses, because like every cartoon from the 90s not starring Batman, it is trash) but I just don’t love the X-Men. I like them, they’re...
July 2010
2 posts
1 tag
inception reception
Status report: Inception was one helluva movie. An intelligent summer blockbuster, another great notch on Christopher Nolan’s belt. I’d offer up something resembling an actual review, except I was too busy enjoying the hell out of this movie to take the mental notes I’d need to write something worthy of anyone’s time.
Anecdotaria: There were some hiccups during the...
on avatar: the last airbender
The cartoon is one of the most entertaining ever made, expertly ranging in tone from serious to light-hearted and comedic.
The movie is one of the most soulless and humorless train wrecks I’ve ever been unfortunate enough to watch.
coming soon: a review of Batman Returns!
Is three years late too late?
June 2010
1 post
as i am wont to do
yeah, okay, so that was a rather extended break. and by extended break, i mean to say, i gave up on this whole blogging thing.
but i’m back!
back once more so that my posts can continue to fill that dogshit-shaped void called The Internet.
anyway, Toy Story 3 was pretty great, you guys.
BONUS POST
i’m considering either getting a second job, or getting a different job. wish me...
November 2009
3 posts
“Doom is scary! You can’t look up, dude!”
– Why I love the Cast at Demonhead podcast
Accidental hiatus
Well wouldn’t you know it, work got, and is getting pretty busy. Working retail, I knew this was coming (especially with the small Jewish community here).
Anyway. After a long day’s work, I don’t rly feel like blogging. Sleeping, playing videogames, listening to music, watching tv, all yes—blogging, no.
Still, I will try to update as often and entertainingly as I can...
To watch The Muppets Movie, or to play a few hours of Persona? I’m so conflicted.
October 2009
16 posts
2 tags
sexist men everywhere applaud woman born with only... →
apparently there’s a woman out there with only half a brain, yet she lives a fully functional life
girl power!
6 tags
slumlord of the week
Jason Statham.
yes Jason Statham, notable action hero and star of the Transporter and Crank franchises, and all around bad-ass.
this week i salute you, fine sir. you, whose adrenaline-filled adventures entertain me year after year.
may you never wind-up an action star has-been relegated to the realm of slightly-amusing internet meme *cough cough steven segal cough cough chuck norris cough...
3 tags
holy shit guys i met donald trump on an elevator:...
okay donnie i know you’re a busy guy right, okay, i get that, but, have you ever noticed, right, have you ever noticed how birds are always pooping on your car? … okay, well, your limo, have you ever noticed how they’re always pooping on your limo? exactly, it’s annoying isn’t it? do you think there’s something we can do about this bird problem? whaddya mean...
The upcoming insect revolution won't be fun
the future insect insurrection upon the human race is much more horrifying than any other act of nature because dammit insects are creepy enough when they aren’t mutated to large feats of stature and working together to ensure the death of their tormentors.
5 tags
linkage? hellyes →
AOL teased me with the headline “What boy did at 14 yrs old changed his life.”
considering the internet is a terrible disgusting place, and considering the terrible disgusting things i did at age 14, i was mighty scared to click on this link, but dammit i trust time warner.
it was just a boring article i didn’t read about how a kid made wind-power with garbage.
of course,...
5 tags
4 tags
hell yes
Netflix and Gamefly came through for me today; Silent Hill Homecoming and Time Bandits, here i come.
2 tags
how to get someone's attention?
pooping your pants is a pretty easy way to get someone’s attention.
3 tags
if i had a magical tree, what type of tree would...
I want Taco
my magical tree grows magical dust which i can sprinkle on people from atop tall buildings unbeknownst to them. the magical dust borrows into their brain, creating a sort of magical cocoon around their cerebral cortex in which one and only one thought will now eternally hold their mind: MUST. GET. TACOS. i laugh as i look on in the chaos created as slowly the human population...
4 tags
relevant? slightly →
today at work i was backstocking books and realized that HOLY SHIT way too many of our books are vampire/other unholy monstrous creatures love stories / romances / high school dramas.
i mean dammit one was even about a 7th grader who finds out she’s a mermaid
which BTW HOW THE HELL does it take you so long to find that out?
re: WoW film
the writer, apparently, is the Saving Private Ryan scribe?
case in point of my questionable taste: i always (always) fall asleep during Saving Private Ryan, and as such, have yet to really watch it.
why, Internet!?
WHY?
2 tags
“I’m not understanding anything you’re saying; it’s like...”
– in response to my friend Adam’s World of Warcraft-speak
8 tags
99 less 90 luftballoons
9 was a pretty dang good film, with bountiful amounts of imagination, adventure, and beauty.
yeah
we aren’t talking about that right now.
superman/batman: public enemies may very well have passed under many of the collective public’s radars (or sonars for those ocularly challenged readers listeners). i would imagine such is the fate of most direct-to-video productions, even those...
5 tags
dear sam raimi
hi!
how could you in any good conscience agree to help make a WoW movie?
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU
have you had a cat scan lately?
thanks,
me
10 tags
dirty little secret
dear internet,
i like horrible and terrible things. yes, yes, question my taste in popular culture, you are the idiots who back brought Family Guy on the wings of the phoenix, not me.
example one, i own the live-action Super Mario Brothers movie. yes, it is amazing. thank you.
so today in my life i learned that Sam Raimi, the visionary behind the revolutionary Spider-Man 3, is directing a World...
forgetful me
So I did have a blogger.com account.
To which I have forgotten the email address and the password.
So, welcome to pop Culture slum. A working title. You like?
More than mudkips?